I see so many people posting or hear so many people saying things like “you’ve showed me true happiness,” “you’ve brought light to my life,” or “I don’t know what life is without you“ or “how can I ever go on?” after they have gone through difficult and traumatic events like a divorce, death, walked away from a relationship that didn’t serve them, etc.
And I’ve done that! I’m still guilty of that sometimes. I used to truly believe that something or someone had to come into my life to complete me, to make me happy. But after a lot of self reflection, I’ve learned that *I* complete me, *I* make me happy because I’ve done the work and am doing the work that allows me to no longer be drawn to people places or things that trigger me or that keep me in the story of “I can only achieve, live, thrive if I have this person or this thing or go here and do that.” It’s not true! It starts inside of you. When you begin to learn WHY you are triggered by certain things, you learn to address those things and understand them and heal them.
When you heal, you attract someone that ADDS to your happiness, that adds to your value, that adds to your complete and whole self. Self worth doesn’t come from someone or something bringing you happiness, it only comes from you creating and believing in your own happiness.
People that believe that they can only be happy because of something outside of themselves will always be looking for the next best thing. And it doesn’t make you a bad person or a failure or not worthy, you are just not aware, you have not healed.. but you CAN, you really can. If you knew how goddamn limitless you were and how divine and how awesome you are and how much goddamn shit you bring to the table that is life.. you will open and you will blossom and you will ATTRACT what has always been for you.
I’ve had my own fears and struggles. I have always had a huge fear of not being able to take care of myself because I’ve been taken care of my entire life (no fault to my dad, he didn’t intend to cause harm, he just wanted to provide) and I have a fear of abandonment or being alone because my parents divorced and my mom moved away (CONT IN COMMENTS)